Hakuuuuuuuuuna Matata!

I watch a lot of the Disney Channel here in Okinawa, as I find the Japanese is easier to understand than regular adult programming. Every morning I watch Winnie the Pooh and Chip and Dale (`Rescue Rangers! ch-ch-ch-Chipu and-o Daru, hayakuuuuuuu!`). This is not casual fun: contraire. I am sitting studiously at my desk, (moved specifically for this purpose from across the room to face the TV), caffeine source at the ready, vocabulary notebook, pen, and dictionary in hand, intently looking up every word that I dont know. Yeah yeah, you all know me. Anywho, the point of this is that there's this really annoying gig that Disney Channel Japan does during commercial breaks that I want to share with you. The Disney channel`s commercials are followed by a short musical interlude. The music: various famous Disney songs, performed by various famous Japanese Boy Bands (really popular here: Backstreet Boy-ish teenage trendy bands, stipulations on being a member of which include looking like a girl and having put many hours of styling into your luscious locks). The whole shebang is cheesy and horrific in that way that only Japan could make it. Soulful renditions of Chim-Chimeny (Mary Poppins) by heart-throbs, with one guy wrinkling his perfect brow in emotion and intent concentration as he dings the chimes, another making Aerosmith contortions of his face, lips pressed against the mike in Awesome Coolness as he croons, `chim-chimeny, chim-chimeny chim chim cherooOoooOooooOOoooo` creating a visual and auditory performance of such complete imbalance that it requires you to stop chewing your breakfast of kidney beans and corn and just drool. The highpoint of this morning`s Hakuna Matata was, just when i thought it couldnt get any worse, the lead singer breaks the routine to perform a gently crooning rap solo. First of all, gently crooning and rap just dont jive. Secondly, Hakuna Matata + rap makes me cringe. Pumba with some bling bling? What's going on, Japan?